Chapter 78, A Simp Can’t Stop Eating Shit

Translator: Tamon

 

“Senior, why so quiet?”

 

Xiao Qiu cocked his head. All the other kills he brought were more than welcomed, gulped in one bite. Why was this time different?

 

Xu Hei’s reply was to give him a pitiful look.

 

Xiao Qiu’s heart sank, a bad premonition creeping in.

 

“Little Xu, you struck gold, huh? Is this your pet?” Hei Huang grinned at Xiao Qiu.

 

Xiao Qiu froze solid.

 

His head creaked over to look at Hei Huang. “Y-you can talk!”

 

“I can not only talk but have a mean bite as well! Woof!”

 

Hei Huang snapped his jaws around Xiao Qiu’s leg.

 

A squeal that had slaughtered pigs blushing echoed. Xiao Qiu hugged his bitten leg and rolled around in the dirt.

 

…

 

With Xiao Qiu tucked away in his familiar bondage, now also hoisted in a tree, below, Hei Huang prepared the same pot the human had, building a nice and warm fire under it.

 

“Xu Hei, this guy wants to eat dog meat. How should we handle him? Roasted, stewed, or fried?”

 

Hei Huang sprinkled seasonings, garlic, coriander, radish, and many other ingredients to bring out the taste of long pig.

 

Dangling from the tree, Xiao Qiu’s face was blank and dead. Then he snapped. “Senior, you can’t just watch me die! Save me!”

 

Xu Hei was put on the spot. [The guy just had to go after the damn dog this time around, and even planned on eating black dog meat. Isn’t that suicide?]

 

Xu Hei mocked, “Won’t be a waste to eat him?”

 

“Hm, you make a good point.”

 

Hei Huang’s eyes shone. “With such thin arms and legs, there’s no meat on them bones. We gotta fatten him up first.”

 

Xiao Qiu eased a breath. It was too soon to celebrate.

 

Xu Hei added, “You should fry an arm first and check out the taste.”

 

Hei Huang’s eyes shone and clapped. “But of course, we gotta savor it.”

 

Xiao Qiu wailed for his dear life.

 

…

 

With the excessive pranking out of the way, Xiao Qiu refound his freedom. He suffered such a scare he looked haunted by all the shivering and dead eyes.

 

Xu Hei was bad enough, but the dog was even crueler.

 

The terror robbed his voice, not wanting to be truly thrown into the pot the next time he spoke.

 

“Hei Huang, what have you been up to these days?” Xu Hei asked.

 

Xu Bai poked her head out of her cave to listen.

 

Hei Huang sighed and spread his paws. “Grave digging, what else? Those sects upped their guard so much making only Augury Sect the only viable target, if barely. But now I’m dog tired.

 

“Oh, and I also handled the hag. Here’s your scales.”

 

Hei Huang placed the 52 dark golden scales on the ground.

 

Xu Hei used them in the fight and He Luohua took them.

 

Xu Hei was stunned. Giving Hei Huang a closer look, he knew he wasn’t the usual joking dog.

 

“Are you serious?”

 

He Luohua was a Golden Core cultivator. The blow she suffered left her somewhat broken and was at the end of her life, but He Luohua was that an easy kill as Hei Huang described?

 

“Ha-ha, what’s there to be shocked about? The hag had only a breath left. The fight spent most of her life and would’ve breathed her last in six months anyway.

 

“The Augury Sect should’ve fallen by now, yet even after half a day going by with their ancestor dying, no one found out. What morons!” Hei Huang cackled.

 

Xu Hei gave a hard nod. He’d seen Augury Sect and how it operated. With no backer or a Golden Core cultivator watching over, they’d soon be swallowed up.

 

“Heavens, Augury Sect’s Ancestor died?” Xiao Qiu shuddered.

 

He became a witness to this devastating news, depending on the point of view.

 

Hei Huang sneered at him. “Oh, how could I forget? You’re that famous simp. Everyone in Augury Sect talked about your glorious achievements.”

 

Dark past exposed, Xiao Qiu had the decency to blush, lashing out. “I was decent back then, not sucking to anyone! And she’s dead now, as is that side of me.

 

“I’ve taken to the righteous path and never again shall I suck up to anyone.” Xiao Qiu held his head high, speaking with conviction and zeal.

 

Hei Huang squinted and gave a creepy smile. “Really now?”

 

“Totally. I am a man and must have a backbone, not go around fawning over women.” Xiao Qiu’s voice was prideful.

 

Hei Huang snickered and took out a corpse.

 

It belonged to a woman but still looked alive. Her skin was soft still, even having a trace of Spiritual Energy and the perfect sleeping face of an angel.

 

“Ling’er!” Xiao Qiu’s eyes bulged and cried out before it.

 

Hei Huang stuffed the body back in his bag.

 

“Look at that, saying you’re no simp when you’re even sucking up to a corpse. There’s no stopping a dog from eating shit.” Hei Huang cursed.

 

Xiao Qiu froze, turning blue and then white.

 

He glared at the dog, pleading in the end. “Could you… give it to me? Wait, just a piece of clothing is enough.”

 

“Take a hike!”

 

“Please, Senior Dog!”

 

“Beat it I say!”

 

Xu Hei looked dumbfounded at the almost kneeling Xiao Qiu.

 

[If that’s not simping I don’t know what is.]

 

[You call that a backbone, sucking up to a dog?]

 

[Obsession is what it is.]

 

Xu Hei shivered, committing this lesson to mind and heart.

 

“Having a good spirit root like yours cultivating with such a mind will take years to even reach Foundation Establishment. What a waste of talent.” Hei Huang was a broken record.

 

The devastated Xiao Qiu was made aware of his issues, hanging his head. “What should I do?”

 

Hei Huang saw him wise enough to seek guidance and no longer crying for a corpse.

 

“Actually, it’s not all your fault. Augury Art is a touch wicked, intoxicating its prey with its use. With your character in particular, you fell for it the hardest.

 

“When you have the resolve and will to overcome the bewitchment, you’d go beyond an average Foundation Establishment and achieve perfection.”

 

“Perfection?” Xu Hei perked his ears, having heard of it before.

 

“Since you’re all at the cusp of reaching Foundation Establishment, listen up.” Hei Huang looked around at Xiao Qiu and Xu Hei, then at Xu Bai coming over.

 

They all lined up, like good kids.

 

“Foundation means compressing your body’s Spiritual Energy into a solid to form the Spirit Foundation. Boundless Spiritual Energy and a long long life are the traits of achieving foundation.

 

“However, the main difference among Foundation Establishment cultivators is their True Qi.”

 

Hei Huang waved and an image appeared.

 

A white strand of True Qi was depicted.

 

“See this True Qi? It’s white. Most Foundation Establishment cultivators’ True Qi is like this, plain, average, boring. Hence average Foundation Establishment.

 

“There are, however, few whose Spiritual Energy is light blue. They’re mostly geniuses with high spirit roots, strong cultivation methods, and resolve. Every aspect is paramount to achieve it.

 

“Blue True Qi Foundation Establishment is a perfect Foundation Establishment!”

 

Hei Huang waved and the image changed to show a light blue True Qi.

 

Xiao Qiu saw it in the records but didn’t know much about it.

 

He lit up and asked in excitement. “What’s the power of a perfect Foundation Establishment?”

 

“Can go against ten at the same level, a fact not a boast.” Hei Huang smiled.

 

Xiao Qiu’s breath hiked up.

 

Xu Hei wasn’t impressed. “Anything above it?”

 

Hei Huang started and nodded. “Of course there is. The deeper the True Qi’s color, the more perfect it is. After blue comes dark blue, then purple, but you’d be lucky to find a handful of them across the whole continent.

 

“Cultivation method is the defining factor. The perfect Foundation Establishment cultivation methods conforming to heaven and earth are few and far between. My Heavenly Devil Art is one of them.

 

“Even I can’t grasp just what kind of genius and talent could create such arts.”

 

Hei Huang put his paws behind him and sighed.

 

Xu Hei recalled the insane pills and was of accord. “Heavenly Devil Art’s creator must be a worldly genius.”

 

The words came from deep within. Those pills couldn’t be made by just anyone.

 

“Of course, but it always pays to be a little modest and average.” Hei Huang snickered.

 

Xiao Qiu frowned. “Heavenly Devil Art? It sounds like a demonic path outside Dao. The creator had to be evil.”

 

“The way I see it, it’s mostly someone reviled by all. All…”

 

He trailed off, noticing the sudden eerie silence around.

 

Xu Hei and Xu Bai watched his smile fade, a weird mood around him forming.

 

Xiao Qiu was speechless.